This is challenge No. 2.
This one has been a little tougher for me to answer, but a very important one for me to personally grapple with. The challenge, said in love, has caused me to seek God continually on the subject and I am finally feeling like I have some sort of answer. I am sure there is much more to be revealed by the Almighty.
I have always been sure, at least 95% of the time lol, that our actions are within the will of God. However when hardships come, a challenge is received, or any other thing afflicting one's heart and mind, it is the single query that arises ... "Are we doing your will, Lord?" "Have we done the right thing (what You want)?" "Father, if we have stepped out of Your will at all, let us know and we will repent and do whatever You say." The expressions of the concern are different, but essentially all point to the same desire - to do only what God requires of us.
A comment was made that if we heard the audible voice of God, no argument. But if what we heard was only within ourselves, then it is subject to the interpretation of what we ourselves, want (in the natural). I completely understand this idea, and it seems quite logical - and safe!
My initial response to this is that the step of Shane leaving work was not borne from just us. There was a third party involved who confirmed the action. Thus it was not just within our spirits, but witnessed within the spirit of a person outside the situation.
For me personally it was a very difficult thing to grapple with as my first husband committed suicide the night he declared he wanted to leave work. Consequently there came a fear within me about being left without adequate income, and worse, my husband. God worked on me several months prior to Shane leaving work and brought me to a place of trusting in the Lord, even if Shane's job ended. At that time I went through a grieving and a letting go process. In this I see His divine hand at work months before we even knew that we would be called to do just that. The week the question of Shane's resignation arose, I still understood the seriousness of it and it took me over 2 days to clear my own self (fears, doubts, worries, stress) out of the way to hear what God was saying. When I finally put myself out of the way, God's confirmation came flooding as a river of peace, truly beyond comprehension. He then reminded me of my prayer to Him a couple of weeks earlier when I had asked Him if it was time for Shane to leave work. Surely God's hand must be evident in these things.
That's two reasons. The third is that there was several days between the decision being made and the actual handing in of his resignation. We asked God to give us clear indication if this was not His plan for us. We waited upon Him, sought Him, bothered Him continuously, and still His peace and joy flowed.
This same seeking has been continued throughout the 3 months since Shane's last day at work, especially when the tough times hit. He has continued to encourage us, not only through our own spirit-to-Holy Spirit meetings, but also through messages at Church, through the Word For Today daily readings, our own daily Bible reading, and other places. Sometimes I think God must believe us completely unfaithful since we keep asking the same questions. He is so full of grace and mercy!!!
However, knowing all this, I kept coming back to the thought of the audible voice of God and our own hearts interpreting the Spirit how WE WANT to. This is where I feel some breakthrough happened this morning, and I believe I have a better grasp on knowing God's will, or more specifically, hearing God's will.
I must first make mention of 2 visions. One was one Shane had a month or so back. He saw a sailing ship at sea heading towards a dangerous reef. It appeared that the ship would crash, but as the ship drew ever closer he began to make out a very narrow gap between the deathly rocks. The ship, seemingly near impending doom, was guided through that impossibly narrow gap and found plain sailing on the other side. Disaster had been avoided by staying focussed on that narrow way.
My vision came sometime after that. I saw myself standing on a tightrope, held high above a void. I knew I was on the narrow path. To step even slightly to the right or left would bring death, but so long as I followed that narrow path exactly, I was safe.
I believe that we both received a different image to describe that which is found in Matthew 7:13-14 'The Narrow and Wide Gates'. However I also believe it was a personal message to stay on the path. Yes, doom and destruction appears to been hard-pressed against us, but God has the way through for us.
That brings us back to this morning when, after our praise and worship time, God brought the same vision to me, with an update. He again placed me on the tightrope and I was somewhere on it where I was totally exposed and yet knew I was 100% safe. He was with me, though I could not see Him. Joy and peace filled me and flowed out from me. I looked down and on the left side of the rope there was a sea of angry sharks. To the right were stacks and stacks of money. The thin line of the tightrope was all that separated them. I enquired of the Lord, "Well, why don't you send the money to the sharks and save us?" I felt the tightrope droop a little and I was lowered slightly toward the sharks and money. Then I felt a weight come upon me. The joy and peace left and I felt heavy as though I was turning to stone. It is a physical sensation that I have experienced before, but this time I could see the spiritual significance. I asked what it was. "The weight of unbelief," came my Lord's reply. Right there I repented of unbelief and asked to be given a heart of faith. The tightrope returned to it's taut position and with the joy and peace once more returned, we continued our journey along the rope.
There is much in this, but I will try to abbreviate.
* Whenever we take our focus from God, we stop on our journey with Him.
* Whenever we lose a God focus, the circumstances grow more threatening.
* If we worry about the circumstances, we are taking back ownership of those things and they can become our responsibility again if we so choose.
* If we choose a God focus, He will take care of the circumstances and we will continue our walk with Him.
In discussing this with Shane, I came to another very important realisation. We have always, even since before we were married, asked God for His will for us, even down to purchasing second hand furniture, cars and the more important questions of marriage, etc. How did we know then, what God's will was? We knew by the peace, the joy and the simple 'know-that-you-know'. When it was not God's will there was that check in our spirit, like a gentle twist of the heart. The peace, joy and 'know-that-you-know' are the same things we have experienced in this whole Wellspring business. Certain aspects have received that heart-check and have been cast aside. Other details have received neither bad or good witness and they have been put on the maybe list. Hearing from God is no mystery. He does not make it difficult. He does not set us up to fail by not answering when we ask.
So, the scale of what we are walking through now is a lot more scary and hugely more costly than whether this model of car or that model is the right one to buy, or none at all. But does that, or should it, alter how we hear God's will? For Him the matters are as flat as a sheet of paper even when for us they are as extreme as mountaintops and ocean trenches.
An excerpt from a teaching by Greg Laurie:
"If you want to know God's perfect and acceptable will for you, give yourself to God. Present yourself to Him without reservation, 100 percent. God is essentially saying, Give Me your life, and then I will show you My will.
Next, don't let this world squeeze you into its mold. When the Bible speaks of the world, it is speaking of a culture that is largely hostile to God. Live the way that God wants you to live. As you do that, you will begin to discover His plan for you. Then you will know what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God. (Romans 12:2)."
We have fully committed our lives, our assets, and every part of every day to Him. We had in fact done this a few years ago in terms of our lives and assets, however the surrendering of days were something that took God's timing to arrive at (and now is the reason for these challenges!). But the fact remains...if we were not in His will, I think we would know it by now.
"God is not trying to make your life miserable. He wants you to reach your potential and live in the perfect plan He has for you. His plan and purpose for you is good. Not only is His plan good, it is perfect. No plan of ours can improve on the plan of God. Don't be afraid to surrender it to Him."
Greg Laurie
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Challenge No. 1
Over the past few weeks we have been issued challenges from a few sources about what we are doing and the Scriptural basis for it. Some of these challenges come specifically from a quoted Scripture, but mostly they are phrased as a known Biblical precept and wisdom. I do not like these challenges in the natural, they tend to make me defensive and worried.
The extent of that natural reaction has greatly reduced from what it was even a month ago, yet still is frustrates me that I am so weak as to have not yet conquered these emotions. My confidence is in God, and it is only my human weakness that allows myself to be jarred from that standing.
However, I am quickly coming to a place of LOVING those challenges. Every single one has brought us closer and closer to God. Our first recourse is to turn to Him and ask, "What is your heart for us, Lord?" The Spirit within us prompts Scriptures so we look to those and find His words of comfort and encouragement. Then, once the immediate feelings of discouragement and fear have been firmly put back to where they belong (with the enemy - defeated and cast out) He then reveals to us the answers to those challenges.
It is tempting to look at only those Scriptures which support oneself, but either ALL of the Bible is God's Word or none of it. We cannot ignore Scriptures that would seemingly not support a particular position we personally hold. I am speaking here of a general principle as well as the application of that principle to our present circumstances.
Rather than make one epic entry covering all these issues, I want to carefully and prayerfully deal with each one separately. This allows for God to speak His fullness. It also gives room for God's grace to rule in my posts since He has warned me against defending our position. God alone is man's Judge.
1 Corinthians 3:11-15
'For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ. If any man builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, his work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each man's work. If what he has built survives, he will receive his reward. If it is burned up, he will suffer loss; he himself will be saved, but only as one escaping through the flames.'
So, to the first question...
2 Thessalonians 3:10
'For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: "If a man will not work, he shall not eat." '
Firstly, to deal directly with this verse. The intention of this verse, I believe, is about willingness to work and about deliberately being idle. Both Shane and I are eager and willing to do WHATEVER God asks us to do. If that were to go and get paid employment, then we would. This is a question we have laid before Him numerous times and always receive the same response - "No."
While our time is not dictated by the outside needs of a regular job there is indeed the possibility of being idle. Yet even at times when I was sick of waiting around we were still 'doing'. My earlier posts demonstrate some of this. However, our main occupation, consuming most of our days, is seeking God in prayer, praise, worship, Bible reading, and watching/listening to Christian teachings. I still take and process photographs. Shane helps people wherever there is a need. We are turning our hands to whatever we find to do.
Jamieson-Fausset-Brown Bible Commentary (my emphasis)
"would not work - Greek, "is unwilling to work."
Matthew Henry's Concise Commentary (my emphasis)
"3:6-15 Those who have received the gospel, are to live according to the gospel. Such as could work, and would not, were not to be maintained in idleness. Christianity is not to countenance slothfulness, which would consume what is meant to encourage the industrious, and to support the sick and afflicted. Industry in our callings as men, is a duty required by our calling as Christians. But some expected to be maintained in idleness, and indulged a curious and conceited temper. They meddled with the concerns of others, and did much harm. It is a great error and abuse of religion, to make it a cloak for idleness or any other sin. The servant who waits for the coming of his Lord aright, must be working as his Lord has commanded. If we are idle, the devil and a corrupt heart will soon find us somewhat to do. The mind of man is a busy thing; if it is not employed in doing good, it will be doing evil. It is an excellent, but rare union, to be active in our own business, yet quiet as to other people's. If any refused to labour with quietness, they were to note him with censure, and to separate from his company, yet they were to seek his good by loving admonitions. The Lords is with you while you are with him. Hold on your way, and hold on to the end. We must never give over, or tire in our work. It will be time enough to rest when we come to heaven."
Secondly, Scriptural responses:
Matthew 6:19-21
'"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.'
Matthew 6:25-27, 31-33
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? ... So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
The extent of that natural reaction has greatly reduced from what it was even a month ago, yet still is frustrates me that I am so weak as to have not yet conquered these emotions. My confidence is in God, and it is only my human weakness that allows myself to be jarred from that standing.
However, I am quickly coming to a place of LOVING those challenges. Every single one has brought us closer and closer to God. Our first recourse is to turn to Him and ask, "What is your heart for us, Lord?" The Spirit within us prompts Scriptures so we look to those and find His words of comfort and encouragement. Then, once the immediate feelings of discouragement and fear have been firmly put back to where they belong (with the enemy - defeated and cast out) He then reveals to us the answers to those challenges.
It is tempting to look at only those Scriptures which support oneself, but either ALL of the Bible is God's Word or none of it. We cannot ignore Scriptures that would seemingly not support a particular position we personally hold. I am speaking here of a general principle as well as the application of that principle to our present circumstances.
Rather than make one epic entry covering all these issues, I want to carefully and prayerfully deal with each one separately. This allows for God to speak His fullness. It also gives room for God's grace to rule in my posts since He has warned me against defending our position. God alone is man's Judge.
1 Corinthians 3:11-15
'For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ. If any man builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, his work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each man's work. If what he has built survives, he will receive his reward. If it is burned up, he will suffer loss; he himself will be saved, but only as one escaping through the flames.'
So, to the first question...
2 Thessalonians 3:10
'For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: "If a man will not work, he shall not eat." '
Firstly, to deal directly with this verse. The intention of this verse, I believe, is about willingness to work and about deliberately being idle. Both Shane and I are eager and willing to do WHATEVER God asks us to do. If that were to go and get paid employment, then we would. This is a question we have laid before Him numerous times and always receive the same response - "No."
While our time is not dictated by the outside needs of a regular job there is indeed the possibility of being idle. Yet even at times when I was sick of waiting around we were still 'doing'. My earlier posts demonstrate some of this. However, our main occupation, consuming most of our days, is seeking God in prayer, praise, worship, Bible reading, and watching/listening to Christian teachings. I still take and process photographs. Shane helps people wherever there is a need. We are turning our hands to whatever we find to do.
Jamieson-Fausset-Brown Bible Commentary (my emphasis)
"would not work - Greek, "is unwilling to work."
Matthew Henry's Concise Commentary (my emphasis)
"3:6-15 Those who have received the gospel, are to live according to the gospel. Such as could work, and would not, were not to be maintained in idleness. Christianity is not to countenance slothfulness, which would consume what is meant to encourage the industrious, and to support the sick and afflicted. Industry in our callings as men, is a duty required by our calling as Christians. But some expected to be maintained in idleness, and indulged a curious and conceited temper. They meddled with the concerns of others, and did much harm. It is a great error and abuse of religion, to make it a cloak for idleness or any other sin. The servant who waits for the coming of his Lord aright, must be working as his Lord has commanded. If we are idle, the devil and a corrupt heart will soon find us somewhat to do. The mind of man is a busy thing; if it is not employed in doing good, it will be doing evil. It is an excellent, but rare union, to be active in our own business, yet quiet as to other people's. If any refused to labour with quietness, they were to note him with censure, and to separate from his company, yet they were to seek his good by loving admonitions. The Lords is with you while you are with him. Hold on your way, and hold on to the end. We must never give over, or tire in our work. It will be time enough to rest when we come to heaven."
Secondly, Scriptural responses:
Matthew 6:19-21
'"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.'
Matthew 6:25-27, 31-33
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? ... So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
The Lord is Faithful
It's been an absolutely dynamite couple of weeks ... in a good way. We have been so thoroughly blessed that I cannot even begin to remember everything.
God has seen to it that we have never gone hungry. Our stores are now much improved thanks to many generous gifts from a variety of donors. Not only practical supplies such as vegetables, meat, pet food and dairy products, but treats such as ice cream, chocolate and potato chips!!! It is amazing how such treats become very unimportant in the face of a lack of good quality foods, but those good things came first and treats were a timely reminder of how much God cares about us, even down to our favourite junk foods.
We are still awaiting God's provision on the monetary front, but we are ever more confident of His meeting our needs before it becomes too late. He has proven so faithful, and we can only but remain faithfully obedient to His word.
The Lord is our strength.
God has seen to it that we have never gone hungry. Our stores are now much improved thanks to many generous gifts from a variety of donors. Not only practical supplies such as vegetables, meat, pet food and dairy products, but treats such as ice cream, chocolate and potato chips!!! It is amazing how such treats become very unimportant in the face of a lack of good quality foods, but those good things came first and treats were a timely reminder of how much God cares about us, even down to our favourite junk foods.
We are still awaiting God's provision on the monetary front, but we are ever more confident of His meeting our needs before it becomes too late. He has proven so faithful, and we can only but remain faithfully obedient to His word.
The Lord is our strength.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Rejoicing in the Ridiculous
Very little has changed since my last post - we have less food, bigger bills, and still no money. Yet, there have been huge changes on the inside - spiritually speaking.
There have most definitely been low points. I became despondent when we ran out of cat food, and I was not alone. Our pets are our children and no parent wishes to see their child go hungry. Once the grief was dispensed with and God's peace again began to settle over our hearts with the knowledge that He will take care of us, we managed to scrape together some bits out of the freezer and pantry. A 2.5kg can of tuna that had been in our cupboard for several years fed them for about a week. Then some fish and sausages were sacrificed from our own meager meat rations. Tonight it will be beef mince. Meat is not the only issue, all of our foodstuffs are pitifully low. I look at the meat we have left - 500g stewing steak, 3 pieces of schnitzel, a few rashers of streaky bacon, and some soup bones - and can only hold tight to the promises of God to provide ALL our needs, including the needs of our pets.
The situation looks desperately hopeless. Add to that the phone calls from companies looking for payment on bills and one might justifiably feel it is all quite hopeless. The truth is far from it; in fact it is wonderfully marvellous. The Truth lies not in our circumstances, not in our abilities or lack thereof, but in Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour. He is the Rock on which we stand. This journey is one of forsaking the ways of this world and relying on God as our Father and provider. It is contrary to what the world expects and to what it preaches. For too long the world has dictated our direction - working just so we can live. We have chosen to live for God and let Him direct our paths. If that means doing without some things, so be it.
God has provided miraculously this week already. On Sunday we were treated to lunch at a friend's house and we came home armed with seeds to plant in the garden, vegetables, fruit, flowers to cheer the home, a 1/3 pottle of margarine, and a promise of a share in some sheep meat this coming weekend (including offal to feed the pets!!). A few days after that we were provided a lunch of sausage rolls, meatlover's pizza, and spiced fruit bread. We were also given a bottle of milk (which we'd been without for a week and a half) and some savoury bread buns for the next day's lunch. The day after that we received a jar of raspberry jam from someone who just happened to drop in and knew nothing of our circumstances. Later that same day came a call, also from someone 'not in the know' donating us 4 loaves of bread. This is such a blessing as I was very aware that there is only enough milk powder to make one more loaf of bread.
We have been, seemingly, to the end of our ability to cope, and yet God pulls us through every time. When we've been ready to take back the reins of our life (meaning a return to the world's way), God has very firmly confirmed that we are right where He wants us to be. The peace is amazing. The joy that He causes to overflow from us is truly divine and miraculous. He is teaching us how to put all of our trust in Him.
Our days now begin with Bible reading and personal quiet time. That is immediately followed by the three of us who live here joining together for a group praise and worship session. We pray and dedicate the day to God and ask for His direction. Each day ends with a praise and worship session, sometimes lengthy (6 hours is the longest so far - until 3am!!!!), sometimes only an hour or so. He is our strength!
We continue to wait on Him. While I wait I find myself loving Him more and more every day.
To God be the glory.
There have most definitely been low points. I became despondent when we ran out of cat food, and I was not alone. Our pets are our children and no parent wishes to see their child go hungry. Once the grief was dispensed with and God's peace again began to settle over our hearts with the knowledge that He will take care of us, we managed to scrape together some bits out of the freezer and pantry. A 2.5kg can of tuna that had been in our cupboard for several years fed them for about a week. Then some fish and sausages were sacrificed from our own meager meat rations. Tonight it will be beef mince. Meat is not the only issue, all of our foodstuffs are pitifully low. I look at the meat we have left - 500g stewing steak, 3 pieces of schnitzel, a few rashers of streaky bacon, and some soup bones - and can only hold tight to the promises of God to provide ALL our needs, including the needs of our pets.
The situation looks desperately hopeless. Add to that the phone calls from companies looking for payment on bills and one might justifiably feel it is all quite hopeless. The truth is far from it; in fact it is wonderfully marvellous. The Truth lies not in our circumstances, not in our abilities or lack thereof, but in Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour. He is the Rock on which we stand. This journey is one of forsaking the ways of this world and relying on God as our Father and provider. It is contrary to what the world expects and to what it preaches. For too long the world has dictated our direction - working just so we can live. We have chosen to live for God and let Him direct our paths. If that means doing without some things, so be it.
God has provided miraculously this week already. On Sunday we were treated to lunch at a friend's house and we came home armed with seeds to plant in the garden, vegetables, fruit, flowers to cheer the home, a 1/3 pottle of margarine, and a promise of a share in some sheep meat this coming weekend (including offal to feed the pets!!). A few days after that we were provided a lunch of sausage rolls, meatlover's pizza, and spiced fruit bread. We were also given a bottle of milk (which we'd been without for a week and a half) and some savoury bread buns for the next day's lunch. The day after that we received a jar of raspberry jam from someone who just happened to drop in and knew nothing of our circumstances. Later that same day came a call, also from someone 'not in the know' donating us 4 loaves of bread. This is such a blessing as I was very aware that there is only enough milk powder to make one more loaf of bread.
We have been, seemingly, to the end of our ability to cope, and yet God pulls us through every time. When we've been ready to take back the reins of our life (meaning a return to the world's way), God has very firmly confirmed that we are right where He wants us to be. The peace is amazing. The joy that He causes to overflow from us is truly divine and miraculous. He is teaching us how to put all of our trust in Him.
Our days now begin with Bible reading and personal quiet time. That is immediately followed by the three of us who live here joining together for a group praise and worship session. We pray and dedicate the day to God and ask for His direction. Each day ends with a praise and worship session, sometimes lengthy (6 hours is the longest so far - until 3am!!!!), sometimes only an hour or so. He is our strength!
We continue to wait on Him. While I wait I find myself loving Him more and more every day.
To God be the glory.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Waiting for the sun to rise
Yesterday during our church service, God blessed me with a wonderful vision - one which continues to be there every time I stop and close my eyes.
Jesus appeared before me, holding out His hand. Understanding He was inviting me to follow Him, I took His hand and walked. The way grew dark and narrow, and I said to Him, "Yes, even here will I follow you." The way became light again and hand in hand we walked up a grassy hill and stopped on the crest looking into the distance. I did not see a view because I was more intent on Jesus.
After a while of standing in silence looking into nothingness, I broached a conversation... "So what are we doing, Lord?" He turned and smiled, "Wait, just wait." I was filled with excitement, joy and at complete peace.
Content to wait beside Him I looked off into the distance again. After a while I became aware that it was not just the two of us as I had first thought. Shane (hubby) was on my right, holding my hand and to his right was God, holding his other hand. To the left of Jesus and holding His hand was our dear sister and friend, Sarah. We were all looking off into the same nothingness. I tried to work out where the Holy Spirit was, and it took me a few minutes to realise He was across all of us, in all of us, and in fact the very bond that connected us together. That was cool.
After some time I saw a glimmer of a sun appearing over a distant horizon. Just the smallest arc. It was about this time that our service ended. The vision had begun near the start of the service and this was the point at which it seemingly ended. However as I went through the rest of the day, including a trip out to Birdlings Flat to go agate hunting, I could see the same vision immediately. Only the sun was higher, rising gradually, but faster than in the natural.
I said to my Lord that I would only go on further if He lead me or took me with Him. I will not go on alone.
This morning it was the same although the sun was fully in the sky now. I again thought to ask Jesus what was going on. "Wait," was His usual reply.
"Can we do something while we're waiting?" I queried.
"There's no time," He replied.
Now herein lies my predicament. We're waiting, but there is no time to do anything while we wait. A complete oxymoron as far as I can tell. In this matter I am struggling with my Lord's sense of humour.
The food situation is getting tight and I am trying to stave off the 'oh no' feelings. I am not even letting my mind head toward the financial issues. That's more than I can bear and is firmly in the hands of God.
So here I am waiting...at the Lord's bidding. How long we must still wait I have no idea. One thing for certain, I am determined to be obedient until the very end of my days.
Jesus appeared before me, holding out His hand. Understanding He was inviting me to follow Him, I took His hand and walked. The way grew dark and narrow, and I said to Him, "Yes, even here will I follow you." The way became light again and hand in hand we walked up a grassy hill and stopped on the crest looking into the distance. I did not see a view because I was more intent on Jesus.
After a while of standing in silence looking into nothingness, I broached a conversation... "So what are we doing, Lord?" He turned and smiled, "Wait, just wait." I was filled with excitement, joy and at complete peace.
Content to wait beside Him I looked off into the distance again. After a while I became aware that it was not just the two of us as I had first thought. Shane (hubby) was on my right, holding my hand and to his right was God, holding his other hand. To the left of Jesus and holding His hand was our dear sister and friend, Sarah. We were all looking off into the same nothingness. I tried to work out where the Holy Spirit was, and it took me a few minutes to realise He was across all of us, in all of us, and in fact the very bond that connected us together. That was cool.
After some time I saw a glimmer of a sun appearing over a distant horizon. Just the smallest arc. It was about this time that our service ended. The vision had begun near the start of the service and this was the point at which it seemingly ended. However as I went through the rest of the day, including a trip out to Birdlings Flat to go agate hunting, I could see the same vision immediately. Only the sun was higher, rising gradually, but faster than in the natural.
I said to my Lord that I would only go on further if He lead me or took me with Him. I will not go on alone.
This morning it was the same although the sun was fully in the sky now. I again thought to ask Jesus what was going on. "Wait," was His usual reply.
"Can we do something while we're waiting?" I queried.
"There's no time," He replied.
Now herein lies my predicament. We're waiting, but there is no time to do anything while we wait. A complete oxymoron as far as I can tell. In this matter I am struggling with my Lord's sense of humour.
The food situation is getting tight and I am trying to stave off the 'oh no' feelings. I am not even letting my mind head toward the financial issues. That's more than I can bear and is firmly in the hands of God.
So here I am waiting...at the Lord's bidding. How long we must still wait I have no idea. One thing for certain, I am determined to be obedient until the very end of my days.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
God is the glory of my days
One day of consulting work by hubby and my payout for a month of photos sold (6 or 7, from memory) brings our bank account into the black for the briefest of moments. What a rush! lol
Living by faith is not for the fainthearted or the faithless. But however much (or little) faith you start the process with, you find plenty of opportunities to increase upon it. :) It most certainly is not something you can do without God...and quite honestly, who would want to?
Then again, why would you want to live life without Him? At the end of your earthly days, what will your life equate to?
Maybe some money in the bank that you can't do anything with...possessions to be dished out amongst relatives...a career or a job that allowed you to survive - with some pleasures if you're lucky. Maybe you're a philanthropist who helps people and makes a difference, but did you lead them to an eternal life and teach them how to earn treasures in heaven?
This whole process of living by faith is teaching me many things. One of the greatest lessons is how to live toward the eternal rather than for my short days on this earth. Having a view toward my heavenly life actually increases the importance of how I live today. I am learning to make God the glory of my days - it's not about me, or what I can achieve. It's about what God can achieve through me for His kingdom, which also brings the greatest satisfaction and happiness. God plants within us the desires of our heart, so when we follow that, God's plans move forward and we enjoy the rewards of obedience - love, joy, and peace. Doesn't that sound like a much nicer life than doing a job for the best years of your life to obtain things that don't last?
Living by faith is not for the fainthearted or the faithless. But however much (or little) faith you start the process with, you find plenty of opportunities to increase upon it. :) It most certainly is not something you can do without God...and quite honestly, who would want to?
Then again, why would you want to live life without Him? At the end of your earthly days, what will your life equate to?
Maybe some money in the bank that you can't do anything with...possessions to be dished out amongst relatives...a career or a job that allowed you to survive - with some pleasures if you're lucky. Maybe you're a philanthropist who helps people and makes a difference, but did you lead them to an eternal life and teach them how to earn treasures in heaven?
This whole process of living by faith is teaching me many things. One of the greatest lessons is how to live toward the eternal rather than for my short days on this earth. Having a view toward my heavenly life actually increases the importance of how I live today. I am learning to make God the glory of my days - it's not about me, or what I can achieve. It's about what God can achieve through me for His kingdom, which also brings the greatest satisfaction and happiness. God plants within us the desires of our heart, so when we follow that, God's plans move forward and we enjoy the rewards of obedience - love, joy, and peace. Doesn't that sound like a much nicer life than doing a job for the best years of your life to obtain things that don't last?
Monday, March 29, 2010
A Physical Cost
There are many Biblical examples of suffering for Christ. Stephen and Paul are 2 obvious ones. Persecution is a well-known suffering, both Biblically and experientially for many around the world.
Here in New Zealand we count ourselves as fairly safe. We have the freedom to worship as we choose. Persecution for me was teasing throughout my school years. How much worse is suffered in Christ's name in countries where it is a crime to say His name.
So yeah, we feel comfortable in our faith. Then - wham! - along comes a suffering that one does not expect. Hubby was doing his helping hands thing yesterday, clearing out the guttering of an elderly lady's house down the street. Unfortunately gravity proved too powerful a force this time and he fell from the roof to the ground, breaking some of the guttering on the way down.
A lump on his head where he hit the concrete, a black eye, abrasions down his left arm and on his chest, and the worst injury, a wrist that we pray is only a muscle strain. Swollen, painful and being treated fervently with R.I.C.E. (rest, ice, compression, and elevation) and doses of a wonderful healing balm called Pedimol.
I mention all this as a testament to my lovely husband because of his comment after the accident. As near as I can remember - "I would rather be doing God's will and suffer through this than do anything else in the world."
Oh, before he tended to himself he repaired the guttering with supplies we happened to have in our garage! The bushes, though, will have to be repaired by the Master Creator Himself.
Here in New Zealand we count ourselves as fairly safe. We have the freedom to worship as we choose. Persecution for me was teasing throughout my school years. How much worse is suffered in Christ's name in countries where it is a crime to say His name.
So yeah, we feel comfortable in our faith. Then - wham! - along comes a suffering that one does not expect. Hubby was doing his helping hands thing yesterday, clearing out the guttering of an elderly lady's house down the street. Unfortunately gravity proved too powerful a force this time and he fell from the roof to the ground, breaking some of the guttering on the way down.
A lump on his head where he hit the concrete, a black eye, abrasions down his left arm and on his chest, and the worst injury, a wrist that we pray is only a muscle strain. Swollen, painful and being treated fervently with R.I.C.E. (rest, ice, compression, and elevation) and doses of a wonderful healing balm called Pedimol.
I mention all this as a testament to my lovely husband because of his comment after the accident. As near as I can remember - "I would rather be doing God's will and suffer through this than do anything else in the world."
Oh, before he tended to himself he repaired the guttering with supplies we happened to have in our garage! The bushes, though, will have to be repaired by the Master Creator Himself.
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